The night when Jimmy meets el Jimador, what happened that night?
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So real life experience this time. My wife is a crazy cat lady except it’s with her damn Pomeranian. She got the dog a stroller. So we’re walking through “Old Town” St Augustine yesterday, dog in the effing stroller. Come upon a homeless dude and I was expecting the usual sob story and gimme a dollar. Instead he said, and I quote “you guys said to hell with a kid and got a dog instead. Y’all are goddam geniuses”. I nearly lost it.
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I thought this was funny, but I ate it anyways, my wife made me an apple cobbler pie today wit a whole stick of butter just the way I like it, except she forgot to Peel the apples 
Frigging old ppl, I don’t know what the F is going on lately, but anyways it wasn’t half bad once ya get past the skins 
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Looks yummy,Rocky. Is that Crumble Topping-Wonder Flavors there? 
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Funny you should say that, cause she looked at me sideways when I said “yum, apple crack” ! 
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Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, “It’s dark in here isn’t it?” The other replied, “I don’t know; I can’t see.”
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladder was in the garage.
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”
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A Blonde, a brunette, and a redhead where sitting in the waiting room at the Obstetricians office when the brunette said “I’m gonna have a boy because I was on top! “
The redhead replies “ Well I’m having a girl cause I was on the bottom”
The blonde starts sobbing historically, and the others ask “What’s the matter?”
The blonde replies “I’m having a Puppy” 
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Bert Kreischer on Netflix 
LMAO
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I will say that when a Pomeranian comes into your life, the word DIVA is an understated word. The Pomeranian we have is treated with more care than I am. That tribble of a dog is just the most pampered little thing around.
P.S. I may have contributed to the pampering as well.
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^^^
I never wanted a Pom. But that pic makes me want one lol.
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Guilty as charged. I’ve disliked lap dogs my entire life until now.
What’s next…fall in love with a cat? God I hope not!! 
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But if you do - I won’t judge.
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Please don’t judge me. Just come kill me. If I start loving cats then I’m done anyway!
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