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Damn those over sized rodents. Capybara < grab that mr google
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Indeed. UPS generally does not package items for manufacturers. If they did, my mirror would have been sandwiched between bubble padding in a heavy gauge box with FRAGILE on the outside. None of that happened.
Let’s move on. I’m now referring to this situation as the Horny as a Bag of Beavers Bathroom Remodel. Sounds weird, I know, but stay with me.
So this morning I get to the part where I’m ripping out the vanity. It’s one of those built-in kind. This upstairs bathroom has seen little use since we bought this house in 2006, so I didn’t even know, but the floor of this vanity had a missing board. But you couldn’t tell by looking as there was a piece of some kind of wall veneer making it look like a solid surface. When I ripped everything out I found these. They’re all from 1997. Wifey said what I was thinking - why couldn’t have been a bag of money?
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You may find a collector on ebay lol
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That would mean I’d have to inspect these things. You know, for pages that are glued together. BLECH! I just can’t. 
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Aww come on… admit it. Your wife found them and you made this post to cover your ass! 
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I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more Tru statement.
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I am stealing that description. And I am going to plagiarize the shit out of it.
Edit: while someone screams the name of a fruit under duress.
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Try to say vapocalypse out loud. @KittyForman and I just tried and it was hilarious.
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So, I did something different this summer. Rather than the copious amounts of beer whilst conducting grilling magic, I chose to imbibe on White Claw instead, hoping to avoid some excess calories and unnecessary carbs.
And this summer I spent more time outdoors than ever due to Covid.
So when my partner Walter and I would share our grilling pics, I’d always text him what I was drinking that day. Bad mistake! He’s not let up on the White Claw jokes all summer. Even though I stopped sending him the photos. But I have to admit, most of them have been funny as hell.
Like this…
And this…
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And now I will always see you dancing singing and skipping to that song!
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As long as wifey still thinks I’m a stud, that’s all that matters. So far, and for 24 years, I’ve had her convinced. 
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You shall be known from this point forward as miss white claw!
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Dude goes to prison. He gets tossed in a cell with a huge, beastly man.
Cell mate says “ok, what you want to be, the husband or the wife?”
Dude thinks about it for a moment, and decides he wouldn’t be violated being the man in the relationship, and says “I’ll be the husband.”
Cell mate says “fine with me. Now get over here and suck your wife’s dick.”
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I only ever drank Jim Beam when I used to go to the night clubs, but if I’d been at the pub since lunch. I got sick of bourbons at 3 in the morning and hit the pink cruisers. (they’re probably an Aussie drink.)
Well anyway I had all the girls handbags this night and some roid head decided he wanted a fight.
I don’t think he expected me to start twirling these 5 handbags screaming and laughing. “These make fuckin awesome weapons do you know how much shit these girls carry around”
He ran away must have been twice my size. 
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I gotta pick up these dead bodies and shit.
Hey it works!
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I can hear my mother’s voice yelling at me and my brother for messing something up, in that exasperated voice only a mother can conjure… THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS
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